God knows our hearts, even when we think He doesn't. 

I strongly believe that I am called to be a stay-at-home Mom, wife, and caretaker. It is part of my biggest dream and goal as a woman and as a person. It is what I long to do. However, the other part of my biggest dream and goal is to live on our land and to have a little pet farm.

Both of these are big dreams and goals to reach. Both of these dreams and goals are not going to just plop in my lap like the way I wish they would. Like all dreams, it takes hard work and determination to fulfill those dreams. My dream might not be to sing on stage or to be in front of the camera or to work in some high-up company. Although those are great dreams to have, too, it's just not mine. 

I used to think that since Hunter is currently here that I needed to drop everything else and hold off on accomplishing my other dreams. It is very hard for me to not want to be with Hunter all the time, especially when my calling is to be a stay-at-home mom. However, I have to remember that there are other things to work towards.

Living on our land is a huge goal and dream that needs to be sought after. Currently, we still live with my mom. Although this has been a  HUGE blessing and gift and although we are comfortable here, we still need to work towards having our own place as a family. 

As much as I want to be a stay-at-home mom now, in doing so, it does not get us very far, at least not very fast. For about a month, I tried being a stay-at-home mom, wife, and caretaker. I absolutely loved it! But, I wasn't getting any closer to my other dream. I wasn't helping my family to reach the goal of living on our land.

Therefore after much prayer and many applications, I finally found a job working at a daycare. And, the awesome thing about it is that I work 3 days a week, which means I get 2 days + the weekend to spend quality time with Hunter, spoiling my husband, and taking care of where we live. It's a way for me to accomplish both dreams at the same time! 

We don't know when we will actually be able to live on our land, but every day gets closer to that dream coming true. Each step I take and we take as a family gets us all closer to our dreams. Until then, I will work on enjoying each day and living for today while praying and looking forward to our dreams coming true!   

After some thinking, I have decided to take a ]break from Facebook, and it might be indefinitely...

Although I enjoy seeing everyone's posts and seeing where everyone is at in life, I have found myself spending too much time just scrolling through. It is my go-to downtime. It's not a bad thing, but when my ever-growing 1 year old is sitting right in front of me and I'm glued to my phone/Facebook instead of soaking up every moment I can with him while I still have him, then it's time to make a change. 

I also have realized that I am back to comparing myself to others. Again, I love seeing everyone's cheerful and exciting news! I love seeing others succeed and accomplish their goals and dreams. Seeing others succeed encourages me to go after my dreams and accomplish my goals. Although this is a great motivator, it also causes me to have jealousy and to focus too much on my future versus what is right in front me. I say to myself, "I wish I could go on a trip like that", or "I wish I could succeed in school like that", etc. Having this kind of mindset isn't healthy because it makes me forget to be thankful for the gifts and blessings that God put right in front of my face. 

Don't get me wrong, I have dreams and goals, in fact I have MANY of them. Some I have shared on here before and others I have not. I will always have dreams. Dreams are important! BUT, when those dreams become more important then what you already have, then it's time to make some changes. It's funny because I feel like I post a lot about being thankful and that is the main goal of "BakersJourney", but I don't even take my own advice. 

It's not that I'm not thankful for what I have, I just don't focus on it as much as I do the future. But, we are not guaranteed tomorrow. Maybe my dreams will come true, and maybe they won't. I can always pray, seek, and do what I can to reach those goals and dreams, but when it's all said and done, all we have is TODAY! So, instead of "wishing for something", I want to start "living for TODAY!" 
"How can I help someone TODAY?" 
"How can I make God proud TODAY?"
"How can I love and provide for my family TODAY?"
"What am I thankful for TODAY?"

I may not get it right all the time, but I hope by making a few changes that it will help me get there, little by little. I remember when I took a break before how much it helped me and how more aware I became of the blessings given each day. So here's to getting back to that... 

I will still post on BakersJourney, so if you want to follow our journey or see some really cute Hunter pictures, then be sure to like and follow our page!

Tah Tah for now Facebook or until further notice!