 As a wife to a loving husband, I am grateful to say that "my baby loves me just the way that I am" (Martina McBride). I don't have to worry about what I have done, what I do, what I will do...or what I look like. I know that no matter what I can count on him to love me unconditionally and wholeheartedly...just like my Lord, Jesus Christ does.
However, along being a wife, I am also a 4'11", 23 year old who struggles with her weight. I would not necessarily call myself "overweight", but coming from someone who used to be fit due to dance classes 3 days a week while in high school, it has been depressing enough just gaining about 20-30 pounds. Now, I'm not saying I was the thinnest I wanted to be in high school either (I was and still am a fan of donuts, Skittles, and Salt and Vinegar chips ;)), but at least I felt better. You might be thinking that 20-30 some pounds isn't all that bad, but for someone who has always cared about what she looks like, having pants that don't fit anymore because they are too tight, it's a big deal to her (to me). Also, for someone who battles with self-confidence at times anyways, it doesn't help that when I stand in front of a body-length mirror and notice she has a "bowling ball belly" shape ;), a thicker low half, and flabbier arms, and when I notice the difference in pictures of what I looked like when I was in high school to how I am now, it is a little frustrating. Alright enough of my own pity party.... In saying all this, I do think their should be a difference from a carefree, adolescent high school-er to a caring, married adult. Being happily married and the joy of being a daughter of the Most High King is something that should be worn on me at all times, no matter what size I am. And, when I do see my self in the mirror, I should see the beauty that my King and that my husband sees in me...and not what I see in myself...... My goal after all of this is to work on getting fit again so that I can feel healthier and to build up more confidence in myself....but my ultimate goal is to learn how to be sufficient in the body that God gave me, and know in my heart that MY God and My husband loves me, just the way that I am! :)
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