I am a Perfectionist!

      As I was saying in the "Daily Walk" page, I am a HUGE perfectionist. I'm not a perfectionist in all areas of my life, but the areas that I am, I really am one! Some of these areas include: my outfits, my hair (even though I don't do a whole lot to it, I still like it and expect it to do what I want it to do), my grammar, my cooking/baking, and being a hostess for get-togethers and parties. There are more, but these are the biggies. 
For my outfits, everything HAS to match from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. All the colors have to go with each other. If I wear any kind of pattern, it all has to be the same kind of pattern, but the whole outfit can't be all pattern, it has to have some solids in there to tone it down.  All of my jewelry has to match my outfit. I can't wear the same thing twice in one week (or more...mostly more). My outfits have to lay just right on me...so no ruffle where there is no ruffle, no lines where there is no lines, nothing poking out, and wherever the length is designed to be at, then that length better be right on me when I put it on, etc. 
      For my hair, all of the pieces HAVE to lay accordingly. Now, again, I'm not one who likes to curl my own hair, straighten my own hair, or do anything fancy to my own hair. I LOVE it when others do it, but for me, I'd rather just wake up, brush it, maybe put a head band in or a hair clip in it, and go. I'm someone who would rather sleep in longer and wake up 30 mins before I have to go somewhere, and be done in that 30 mins. However, when I do brush it and put something in it, then it better do what I want it to do, or when I put it up in a pony tail or in a big hair clip, then the top of my head better be as straight as possible, with no lumps or straggly hairs, or again, when I wash my hair and put it up in a bun with a scrunchie, and when I take it out and shake my hair around, then it better look extra wavy like it's supposed to look. 
      For my grammar, I am more of an English person, so having proper grammar is a big deal to me. I'm that person who when I text, I text the whole word out, I  put correct punctuation in the correct spots, I use the correct "they're, there, and their", "to, too, two", "where, wear, we're", etc.....or I at least try to do all of that correctly, but sometimes the auto-correct will change it into something else, which can get annoying at times haha. 
      For my cooking/baking, oh my goodness, this is probably one of my top biggest areas of being a perfectionist in out of the other biggies (and that's saying something haha). My ultimate goal when it comes to cooking/baking is to be able to make to everything homemade or at least most of it without having to rely on a written recipe all of the time. But, since I'm still learning how to cook and bake, and all of the techniques and such behind it, I still have to use recipes from a book, a card, and/or Pinterest, so I can know what to do and when to do it. And, often times, when you use a written recipe, then there is a picture that goes along with it so you know what it's going to look like when it's finished. Well, because I am a perfectionist in this area, if whatever I cook or bake has a picture with the recipe, then my finished product better look exactly like it does in the picture! It HAS to be picture perfect, just like it looks in the picture for the recipe. And, of course, it has to taste exactly right, too!
      For my hosting of get-togethers or parties, I typically plan ahead of time of how I want the event to go, what food I want, what decorations I want, etc. When it comes time to prepare all of these things, it all HAS to go smoothly. It better not have any snags, bumps, or mishaps along the way. And, the finished project absolutely has to look and go perfectly!
      If any of these thing don't work out like they're supposed to, then you better watch out! ;) It's in these times when I show my true colors haha. I can get soooo frustrated and irritated when it doesn't work out. I usually huff and puff and yell, "Come on!" or "Stupid!" to either myself or the object(s) that is making me upset lol...(Don't judge me ;) haha). Sometimes when it gets really bad, like when I keep dropping my fresh produce on the floor as I'm chopping them up, I get all quiet. That's when I know and my husband knows that it is NOT going well, and that I just need to be left alone in those moments lol...(Man, I'm really telling on myself on this one lol).

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When I get that upset though, I start putting myself down, which I know isn't good, but that's just something I do. When things don't go right in those areas of my life, then I get all depressed and feel like a failure. And, I feel that way for a quite a long time.
      But, when I take a minute to step back, I realize that the things that get me soo emotional are really just simple, frivolous things to get upset over. I mean, in the moment, if feels like it's the biggest deal in the world, but in the big scheme of things, it's actually quite small when you compare it to other big deals in this world like starvation, death, etc. So, this is a continuing lesson learned process of not getting so caught up in these "...terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day" kind of moments, but instead looking at it from a more positive, different approach...which is that I am still young, and that I am still learning how to get through different obstacles that come my way (Viorst, "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day"). And, in order for me to get through the big hoops and jumps, I have to learn how to get through and to conquer the smaller steps in life....even if that means being frustrated at times. ;) :)